Day-to-day emotions are really beginning to piss me off!!  One day I’ll be all jittery and excited–then pissed off the next day for being so jittery the previous day. …?!… [Is that weird? I'm pretty sure that's weird.] *sigh* Maybe I just need to stop over-analyzing every Gorram thing I do each day.  I’ve been trying to meditate like I used to, but I can’t seem to get back that focus. It isn’t like there’s more shit on my mind, hopefully there’s less, and yet It’s like my fracken brain won’t shut the frack up!  

   I realized this when the other day I had a brief moment of tranquility. I was ambling through town with no real agenda, going for a stroll as they say.  I passed by a tree and a leaf caught my attention. there was a dead leaf ready to fall from it’s branch, of course it shouldn’t hold much intrigue–but it’s a few days till Spring!!  I mean c’mon, why the frack is there a dead leaf amongst all this new life? [I'm gonna have to come back to this]    So yeah, I was staring at this leaf and for maybe 4 seconds I had been thinking of absolutely nothing but this leaf: the color, texture, the way it was desperately wishing to fall from the branch.  Basically I was thinking of nothing but this single thing, I relish these few moments of peace from the cacophony of garbled shite running through my head.  However, It did make me realize just how scattered my mind has been lately.  Whelp, there’s more things for me to ponder as I wander. [...heh. heh heh...AHAHAHA...*sigh* ohh, that amused me far more than it ever should]

all right, I’m out.